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How to Talk to Kids About Homelessness - The New York Times

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Good morning.

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Today, we have the latest dispatch from Marie Tae McDermott, for our series answering readers’ questions about inequality in California:

Homelessness is a part of everyday life for many California schoolchildren, for those who experience it and those who see it near schools and playgrounds.

“I’m a working mother of two who has had to raise children to be not only aware and empathetic toward homeless people, but have also had to train my kids how to instantly spot an aggressive mentally ill person who may be a threat to them,” wrote Kristin, a reader in San Francisco.

Marlene Arias, a reader in Temecula, asked, “What do children think about the homelessness problem?”

There are several ways to talk to kids about homelessness. My colleague Jennifer Medina, who lives in Los Angeles, wrote about her approach with her own children.

She also invited readers to talk about how they handle these difficult conversations. (Here are some of their responses.)

One way we can start tackling the conversation is by looking at our children’s schools, since many of their peers may be homeless.

In the 2016-17 school year, California had a staggering 262,848 homeless students enrolled in public schools. But unlike much of the state’s homeless population who live outside, the majority are living in shelters or they are doubled up, meaning they share a single space with multiple families.

To find out more about how homelessness is being talked about in the classroom and at home, we spoke to high school teachers who responded to our call for questions.

“Homelessness is in many ways an invisible issue in schools,” said Aaron Pribble, a high school teacher in Mill Valley, Calif. He said that students were often unaware that some of their peers spend their nights in shelters, motels, cars or on a friend’s couch.

[Read about what it’s like to live in your car with a young child.]

Mr. Pribble, an author and social studies teacher, weaves the issue into his curriculum. When his students learned about the Great Depression, for instance, they also discussed how mass unemployment leads to homelessness.

“Students learn more when teachers make connections between their curriculum and the world in which students live — and this is especially true of homelessness,” he said. “When students think about how much their own homes are worth, or how much their parents are paying for rent, they’re more able to understand why homelessness is such a big issue.”

The median home price in Marin County, where he teaches, is $1,115,200, according to Zillow estimates.

Vanessa McGrady often talks about homelessness with her adopted daughter, Grace, 8, whose birth parents are homeless.

“We come at homelessness probably a little bit differently,” Ms. McGrady said.

Grace has seen the tent where her birth parents live, but it’s hard to talk about the reasons they became homeless. According to Ms. McGrady’s own research, the couple were living in Los Angeles and became homeless after their apartment became infested with bedbugs and Bill lost his job. They were unable to get back on their feet.

[Read about how skyrocketing housing costs are destabilizing the lives of working renters.]

“We talk a lot about helping people and the choices people make, but it’s nearly impossible for me to begin to explain the complexities of why this country is so monstrous in how it treats it most vulnerable residents,” she said. Ms. McGrady chronicled her experiences in a memoir.

“Children are naturally curious and empathetic,” said Michelle Sorkin Levy, a mother of two young kids. As a city planner, she often talks to them about the ways in which cities function. Seeing people in need is a teachable moment for her.

“I don’t discourage my kids from talking to the homeless people we see or asking questions. I remind myself that they are our neighbors, too,” she said.

What questions do you have about inequality in the state? Ask them here.

More from this series: What is middle class in California? How do the state’s homeless rates compare with those in the rest of the country? Where do homeless people in California come from?

Follow Marie Tae McDermott on Twitter.


We often link to sites that limit access for nonsubscribers. We appreciate your reading Times coverage, but we also encourage you to support local news if you can.

  • Even as his presidency teeters, aides described President Trump as obsessed with narrow policies that directly affect California. [The New York Times]

  • An indicted associate of Rudy Giuliani has reportedly said he would tell Congress about meetings Representative Devin Nunes, a top ally of President Trump on the House Intelligence Committee, had with a former Ukrainian prosecutor to talk about digging up dirt on Joe Biden. [CNN]

  • In yet another turn in the extraordinary saga surrounding the case of the Navy SEAL Chief Petty Officer Edward Gallagher, Defense Secretary Mark T. Esper on Sunday demanded the resignation of the Navy’s top civilian leader after he disagreed with President Trump on the matter. [The New York Times]

  • In Oakland, where her campaign launch rally drew tens of thousands of supporters, some are now wondering where Senator Kamala Harris has been. [The New York Times]

  • A week after a student opened fire at a high school in Santa Clarita, the police said they thwarted at least two potential school shootings in Los Angeles County. [The New York Times]

  • The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention told consumers not to eat any romaine from Salinas after at least 40 cases of E. coli across the country were linked to contaminated lettuce from that area. “Use by” dates of recalled products range from Oct. 29 to Nov. 2. [The New York Times]

  • A school district in Carmichael is investigating an incident in which a teacher threw away students’ Black Lives Matter posters. [The New York Times]

  • If you missed it, the AIDS Memorial Quilt is set to return home to San Francisco. Its archive of personal items will go to the Library of Congress. [The New York Times]

  • A year after their story went viral, the owners of Donut City in Seal Beach — where customers lined up to buy out the store every morning so the shop’s owner could spend time with his ailing wife — are thriving. [The Daily Pilot]


As I mentioned on Friday, the Bay Area played host to one storied rivalry match on Saturday, California versus Stanford, also known as the Big Game. (It might be unseemly for me to mention who won, but you can read about how the game ended here.)

In Southern California, a record-breaking performance by U.S.C.’s quarterback led the team to a victory over its crosstown rival, U.C.L.A.

But for Arit John — who wrote about her time as a “Tuba Girl” in U.C.L.A.’s marching band — the game was never really about football.

Marching band, she wrote, was “a microcosm of the student body that I could reasonably navigate. It was where I learned how to be a young adult.”

Check out more behind the scenes photos of the bands at work.


California Today goes live at 6:30 a.m. Pacific time weekdays. Tell us what you want to see: CAtoday@nytimes.com. Were you forwarded this email? Sign up for California Today here.

Jill Cowan grew up in Orange County, graduated from U.C. Berkeley and has reported all over the state, including the Bay Area, Bakersfield and Los Angeles — but she always wants to see more. Follow along here or on Twitter, @jillcowan.

California Today is edited by Julie Bloom, who grew up in Los Angeles and graduated from U.C. Berkeley.

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