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How to talk to your kids about school shootings - Los Angeles Times

The shooting at Saugus High School in Santa Clarita on Thursday touched off intense, heart-sinking fear among many teenagers who ran for cover, barricaded classroom doors with tables and chairs, and hid in closets. Later, as they were reunited at a park, evacuated students and parents collapsed into each other’s arms in long, tearful hugs.

“Fear made it feel like we were waiting in silence forever,” Andrei Mojica, 17, said of his AP government class where students prepared to use a fire extinguisher as a weapon if needed.

“How do we recover and step forward past this incident?” Mojica asked.

As students deal with the aftermath of Thursday’s shooting that left two students dead and three others wounded, parents and school personnel can help them cope. Here are some tips from the National Assn. of School Psychologists and other mental health experts on how to do so:

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1. Reassure youth that they are now safe and validate their feelings.

Adults should take these important steps first, experts say. Kids who feel unsafe can have a hard time concentrating, or can become anxious and more afraid. Let children know that everything they are feeling is OK. Help them express those feelings.

2. Treat children according to their age.

Give young children only brief, simple information. Limit young children’s exposure to television news, as violent images can cause secondary trauma and developmentally inappropriate information can cause anxiety and confusion.

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Read or watch the news with teenagers, and talk to them about it. This allows you to filter the information they take in. Answer specific questions with accurate information. Emphasize the role students can play in maintaining safe schools by following school safety guidelines, talking to administrators about any personal safety concerns and accessing support for emotional needs.

3. Model healthy behavior.

Children pick up everything their parents are saying and doing, so remain calm when talking to them or discussing a situation in front of them. Show them how they can cope with what they are feeling.

3. Have a plan.

Review safety procedures at school and at home. Let children know whom to call, where to meet and how to communicate in case of an emergency. This helps children feel secure and know adults are in control.

4. Maintain routines.

Sticking to regular routines can be reassuring and help kids maintain a sense of normality. At the same time, don’t push kids to do their normal activities if they seem overwhelmed.

6. Observe children’s emotional state and seek help if necessary.

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Watch for changes in behavior, mood, appetite or sleep. In most children these symptoms will resolve over time, but some may have a more intense reaction and need help from a mental health professional.

Times staff writer Brittny Mejia contributed to this report.

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