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Sharon Capriccioso
Sharon Capriccioso
Sharon Capriccioso
Sharon Capriccioso
Accepting help from others - what a slow and reluctant learner I was. Suddenly one summer, it clicked! I think I've got it now.
My final lesson one summer came from a student in our school whom I had never had the honor of teaching. When in third grade Patrick Hansen was diagnosed with leukemia. (His mother has given me permission to use his name.) He fought a brave and courageous battle and was hoping to graduate with his sixth-grade classmates from elementary school. He reached that goal and then spent the summer in and out of the hospital. Most of his visitors were adults with the need to give something, anything. They held on to the hope that by giving they would find some small comfort of their own at this very painful time. I became a frequent visitor to his hospital room that summer. It was my summer of learning the beautiful, selfless art of "accepting" from others whether or not their offers are needed or perhaps even wanted.
Before each of my visits, I would call and ask the young patient if my timing for a visit was convenient. It always was. Then I asked what I could bring. His most frequent request was a can of black olives and a can of SpaghettiOs. I would stop at the grocery store and buy two cans of each. I didn't buy 10 or 20 as I was tempted to do. Buying a huge supply might mean that I wasn't needed again for a while. I wasn't willing to take that risk. Immediately upon my arrival, this patient would open the cans and eat from them, a spoonful of black olives, a spoonful of SpaghettiOs, until they were gone. He acted as though he had never tasted anything so delicious.
We had wonderful visits over those cans of olives and SpaghettiOs. We laughed and shed tears from the heart. I'll never know if the items I brought were truly ever wanted, but I know the friendship was. Of one thing I'm sure, he taught me the gift of helping others feel unique and needed by his simple requests and acceptance.
Why did this lesson take me so long to grasp? I believed that I was less than capable and weak of spirit if I were to accept another's offer to help. The children never gave up on me. They taught me this concept over and over again, day after day, year after year. Finally, I believe I've mastered the skill. The mastery came with the realization that rather than being less than able when accepting help or even advice from others, you become exulted in their eyes. For with acceptance gives others the opportunity to feel needed, wanted, and, above all, loved.
The "child/patient/teacher" changed my life that summer. It was the summer he lost his own. Now, when others offer help or their presence during a time of need, I accept graciously. It is in acceptance that true and lasting friendships are made.
Cans of black olives and SpaghettiOs still hold a place of honor in the cupboard of my mind.
Sharon Capriccioso taught school at Blessed Sacrament School for more than 20 years. Here, she writes about the lessons learned from her students. Her lessons will appear on a monthly basis in the weekend Accent section.
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A teacher's lesson from the children: Accept help from others - Midland Daily News
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